Comments for Catholic Parents

Comment on Why no more in church? by momof2

momof2 — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 17:32:52 +0000

Sherry (reply to 2/13 entry)
I have two ASU students who chose to live at home so they will be debt free when they graduate. As part of that agreement /at the time of enrollment, we set some rules for “still living under my roof” . We actually had a contract signing session . There was some negotiating, but one of those rules included attending weekly mass. We make plans early in the week to include Sunday mass. My concession is I go where they go whenever possible and they go where they like/can fit it in. Sometimes that’s 10:30, sometimes Teen mass and sometimes the Newman Center. I try to get a little additional time with them by offering breakfast, Jamba Juice, or pizza at Nello’s, etc. after mass when we can attend together . Peace.

Comment on Why no more in church? by hsmom

hsmom — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 19:06:22 +0000

Hi Sherry, I fortunately have a college aged son who attends mass on Sunday, however one of his friends when going to college, decided he didn’t want to go to mass anymore. My son was praying for him and I would think that his parents also were. Hopefully they were setting the example and going to mass, because I believe that actions say more than words. So I would say to let them make that decision, but you as a parent cont. to go to mass and pray everyday for her. Perhaps a special novena would help, St. Joseph was in charge of the Holy Family, maybe one to him would be good. Peace!

Comment on Why no more in church? by hsmom

hsmom — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 18:21:53 +0000

Dear Fr.Pawel, I absolutely agree with # 10 in that they have to have a personal encounter with the Lord to “own” their faith. My thoughts on this is that I as a parent will provide the following:
1. attending mass every Sunday without question
2. praying all the time and asking the Lord to touch her in a special way
3. mulling over spending time in adoration, did that with my son in 7th grade for a 1/2 hr. each week, however don’t know if all this “catholic stuff” as she puts it will push her away further, so I haven’t started this with her yet.
What are your thoughts Father on too much “pushing this stuff”….we also attend daily mass every Friday and have a first Friday devotion to the Sacred Heart, am I “pushing too much?” Thanks for your input.

Comment on Why no more in church? by Sherry

Sherry — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 06:01:15 +0000

MsAnAZ – Thank you for your response. My daughter is in college and living at home and does not want to go to church anymore. Any thoughts? Anyone? What are your “house rules” regarding adult children living at home and church attendance?

Comment on Why no more in church? by Fr. Pawel

Fr. Pawel — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 05:13:11 +0000

Dear hsmom, I will be happy to join you in thinking. My first question is, however, whether you had some time to look at the reflections we all have made above. What from the suggestions so far on this blog page would you find helpful in your situation? What do you find missing? Blessing.

Comment on Why no more in church? by hsmom

hsmom — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 21:09:06 +0000

on point #4, my daughter who will soon be 13 has already questioned her faith and the battle I face is that my husband, her dad, does not embrace any faith so therefore this young girl is seeing that her father doesn’t believe and rolls her eyes anytime I talk to her about her faith. Although she still goes to church every Sunday, I feel that in her mind she is thinking that it is a waste of time. How do we combat this? Of course we cont. to go to mass and being active in our parish will continue, I feel helpless at changing her heart. Any suggestions?

Comment on Chastity by hsmom

hsmom — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 21:01:23 +0000

I would like to say, as a mother of a son who is now 20 yrs. old and off at a catholic college I experienced first hand finding him reading a porno site while in High School I thought I was safe because I homeschooled, but wasn’t. We addressed the problem, he was open for help and was actually glad he “got caught” so he said later. Before he went off to college we placed a no porno filter on his laptop, which is something he wanted to do! I am grateful for the grace to approach him, help him and the cont. grace to support him in avoiding these temptations.

Comment on Why no more in church? by MsAnAZ

MsAnAZ — Sun, 10 Feb 2008 23:26:33 +0000

Dear Sherry,
In response to your question, about what age a child/teen should make their own choice about going to mass, I feel that it is important for you, as a parent to guide them to mass each week. Our youth are very impressionable, and need guidance at many points in their life; just as God is there to guide us when we make our choices.

I believe that kids want to have control of how they do things in their life, but at the same time we need to fulfill God’s will and guide them to Mass each week. I challenged myself with this question once: If a car were coming down the street, and my sons basketball went into the street, would I let him go after it, or would I guide him and say NO! don’t get the ball yet. I would guide him and make sure he was safe.
This somewhat parallels the issue of letting them make their own choice to go/not to go to Mass.
Just something to think about. Good luck!

Comment on Sports or Mass? by Fr. Pawel

Fr. Pawel — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 02:34:13 +0000

Dear Rita, it sounds like you both do your best to be good witnesses. Your boys see that you have a spine and that there are certain values which require tough choices. No matter what their choices regarding church are later in their lives you have provided them with this precious example that decent life includes values and character.
If Sat/Sun Mass is absolutely impossible I would recommend a weekday Mass (esp. Sat morning) as I already said in the introductory statement.
As I also said there, if it is God’s will for your sons to have both – then both things will be possible to have.
As Catholics we do sin if we miss Mass unless the reason is grave (look at “Excused” in the introduction to ‘Why no more in church’). If you are not sure whether the reason is grave, please, check with your pastor.
An excuse from Mass may be valid and thought through, or may be a first step in relativism.
I can hardly think of a situation when you skip Mass on Sunday and cannot make it up on another weekday at all. And if this is the case, then the reason must be really grave.
In case of doubt we would like to make sure that we bring it to God in the sacrament of reconciliation (confession) maybe not the very next day in fear and terror but definitely in the next future with trust and love.
I would start all reflections about choosing Mass or not with “Why go to Mass” as explained in ‘Why no more in church’.

Comment on Chastity by Fr. Pawel

Fr. Pawel — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 02:05:57 +0000

Sharon, thank you so much. It will not be overwhelming if many of us get together.
I admire Ted’s courage to share with us and I am thankful for the very valuable insights. Let us pray for him and his family that they can withstand trials.